Wow! I can't believe that it has been two weeks since I have updated! For someone so busy, I can't think of any big news to share :) I took the girls to San Antonio last week. We had studied the Alamo and I thought it would be cool to go and see it. We had a great time!
You know what, I have been having a great week! Praise God for the great weather. I have to say though, there is something weighing heavily on my mind. I am stepping into a new position in our co-op. It is one that carries a great deal more responsibility than I have had previously. Frankly, I am terrified!
I KNOW that God put me in this new position. I have no doubts about that and it is what I cling to. But I am not sure I have ever felt so inept and inadequate! I see how wonderfully the ladies that are in the positions now are so able to keep to task, yet show so much mercy. Their ability to make Godly decisions amazes me. We had a meeting today and I sat there and listened to the head honcho speak about considering things that had never even crossed my mind! Such grace and mercy and thoughtfulness, yet firmness and confidence!
I MUCH prefer to do things that I feel able and confident to do. I am seeing that it is harder for me to rely on God's confidence and strength than my own. As I sit with my mouth open waiting for something intelligent or wise to come out, I am crying out to Him to fill my mouth because my head draws a blank!!
I usually don't attempt things that I don't think I can be successful at so this is really new for me. The only confidence I can have in this is that He called me to do it. I know that should be enough, but my doubt creeps in a lot. I continue to pray that God will push those thoughts out, and I know He will.
Oh, but the sweet people that I will serve! To just be able to share in so many peoples lives is so exciting. Oh, Lord please give me wisdom and discernment! Please fill my mouth with your will and not my words! When success and glory come at the end, it will only come from you!!
Praise God that He gives strength to the weak and inadequate!!! I am waiting to mount those eagles' wings!!
