Week One!!!

What I have struggled with: I must admit that I am now getting restless. I found myself today thinking, hey I could just do this for another week, two would be enough! I think now that taking away the conveinences are starting to become part of our habits, some real issues are popping up. For one, my selfishness. I am seeing how easily and quickly I skip from thinking about others to thinking about myself and how things will affect my life. For example...I will bake dinner and bring it to so and so. That will make them feel better.....and they will like me more.

I really hate the fact that I fall into that so quickly. I am struggling with that a lot this week. I know that there is only one way to get rid of the selfish thoughts and desires, and that is to ask the Almighty for help, but frankly, I am afraid to do that. Instead I spend my time reading scriptures and thinking about what I can do to fix it and not asking Him for help. Why would I be afraid? you ask. I struggle with the mindset of when you ask God to change something in your life, He does it with a tragedy. My head knows that this is not truth, but my heart is not as knowing.

William and I were talking this week about an issue he was having with Kalli being sick and he told me about something he prayed for. The first thing out of my mouth was, "You don't pray with disclaimers!?" Now, I was slightly kidding, but largely serious. I pray with disclaimers like....God, please build my faith, but please don't teach me with anything involving my children or husband and could you also try to teach me in the small quiet way, I will really try and pay attention. I figure probably every parent feels this to an extent....do any of you feel like this?

Anyway, away from my ramblings and back on topic.....eerrr, I forgot the topic. Oh yes, my selfishness. Well, I am struggling with this right now. I am amazed at how when you peel some of the layers of your everyday life back, how quickly the issues show up!


What my family thought: I must say that I think they are doing better than I am. Brianna and Tori both have such sweet, giving hearts. They would honestly give up whatever was needed to help someone else. Brianna gave up having a birthday party or trip this year and gave her money to a christian group that goes to other countries to provide medical care. My Tori is always sticking up for the underdog! She is normally pretty shy, but when she hears someone speak a hateful word to someone else, she will speak up. Even my sweet Emaleigh left her first team practice this week and said she did not think she wanted to be with that team because they were not nice to one of the little girls on the team. I am so glad that despite my selfishness and all of my flaws, God have given my four babies a heart that yearns for Him.

What I have learned: When I let go of a part of my life to free up for Him, I try to fill it up with something else. This week I have been on the computer soooo much. Reading things, watching free shows. Though my reading was for good things and the shows were great, I am filling my time up instead of "being still and know that I am God." Which is one of my purposes of the exercise in the first place.

I will say though that William and I have had the time for some awesome discussions this week! More about that later :)

What I want to learn: Still the same, I want to yearn for God. I want to think of Him first thing when I wake up and last thing at night and all in between!

Thanks for sticking with me this long!!!

Day Two!!!

What I struggled with: A couple of things have been on my mind today. First is that I don't want anyone to think that I honestly compare our little exercise to the millions that are starving and suffering. I just want our family to be thoughtful of those in circumstances other than ours. I also want us to look at simplifying our lives so we are more able to focus on what is important.

Second thing is how much I am already trying to justify cheating. I would think, just one quick stop or one little thing really is okay. Luckily I have Brianna to keep me on the straight and narrow.

What my family thought: Well, it hit the girls a bit more today. Tori wanted to buy a tshirt at her meet today. She accepted what we had all decided, but I think it was hard for her. Brianna helped me shop and cook today. When we do our biweekly grocery shopping, we usually stop at Starbucks first and we had to skip that. They are still really excited though. I think it is one of those things where you want to help, but don't know how. They feel like they are helping in some way.

What I have learned: Today I have learned about living and planning for not just today, but down the road. William and I talked about how when you strip away our conveniences, we are forced to stop and look at where we are and where we want to go. I think too often we just go down the road until it dead ends, never really knowing where we are at. Brianna and I talked about what need money fills for our society. She thought that it was a need for control. I can definitely see that.

New Category.....What I want to learn: I want to experience stillness. I want to be able to hear His still, small voice. That is hard to do amid such chaos.

Wicked!

Oh, today has been so fun! I took Brianna to see the Broadway musical "Wicked". What an outstanding performance. It was awesome. I enjoyed spending time with Brianna. We got to talk together on the trip to the performance hall. We had great seats and the three hours just flew by! Wicked is the story of how the two witches in the Wizard of Oz came to be. Great story!!! We had a great time!

Then I got to go and watch Tori do her tumbling class. She is in a higher level class now and is doing really great.

I am pooped and looking forward to the weekend, but I wanted to just check in and also leave you a picture from today!!

Later :)

A Day at School!

Date Night!

Okay, I mentioned last week about trying to simplify my time and I spoke a little more about it yesterday. I said I was going to walk tonight while Tori is in her gymnastics class. Well....I had an even better idea. William is going to meet me there and we are going out to dinner together and then walk together! Wooohoooo! I would say this is excellent use of my time, being able to spend it with the most wonderful man on earth! As you can tell, I am really excited.

On Thursday, Brianna and I have tickets to see "Wicked". We have awesome seats! Both of us are really excited. She had really wanted to see the show so we got tickets in December for her birthday. We are going to go out to lunch together first so if you have any suggestions, let me know!

Today Brianna still has one co-op class and Tori is supposed to go to a movie watching party, but I am not sure we are going to make that yet. Then of course William and I have our date.

May you have an outstanding, blessed day!

You know how excited you get when you reach the last hour of an eight hour drive? That hour seems to fly because you have entered familiar territory and you see an end in sight! That is how I feel today! First of all, tomorrow is the beginning of the weekend and then after this week, we have only 5 weeks of school to go!! Yoohooo!!! I am ready for an awesome summer with the girls. I don't think we are going to travel as much this summer, we are going to spend lots of time hanging out around here. I think Kalli is old enough this summer that we will be able to do more all together.

The girls received their awards for LTC last night. They were very pleased with the results, though a bit disappointed that chorus (yes, the one I directed) got a silver. I don't agree with the final result, but such is life. I told the girls that a lot of times we don't get what we deserve, and most of the time that is a good thing!

We were able to go to church last night for the first time in about three months. The girls had swimming and then gymnastics which made us unable to go. I had really been a bit restless with my church experience. We had talked about looking elsewhere for a place to attend. We have really discussed and prayed about the right thing to do. Our main concern was that our 12 year old and our 5 year old really have not found their "place". Brianna is pretty laid back and rolls with the punches, but it was really bothering Emaleigh (5). She does not seem to have any problems making friends anywhere except for at church. I must admit that when we invited everyone her age a year ago to her birthday party and only two even bothered to RSVP or come, I was pretty discouraged. She has never been invited to a birthday party of anyone her age at church except one sweet little boy! Pretty discouraging! Anyway, we have decided that we are needed where we are at and can use it as a lesson of what we should be with our church family. I do however hope that they can both find some friends there. I remember growing up that was where my best of friends came from! It was great to be back last night!

I attended a class last night about simplifying your life to further the kingdom. I have thought about simplifying before, in fact I have read many books about it, but never for the purpose of living a more Godly life! What a great thought! I really started to think about where we were in this picture. We have simplified our stuff. Every few months we go through and get rid of any excess and it feels pretty good. Last night has shown me though that we are hoarding something else now in its place, activities. We are gone all of the time and though it is for good things, how can we further the kingdom if we never slow down to experience it! I am really glad that I was able to attend this class. The girl that teaches it is such an inspiration! She had a baby just about 2 months ago and yet she is there, very prepared and ready to go. Boy do I feel bad about my whining about being too tired! I am going to start praying about where to cut back on our commitments and see what happens!

Well, I had given the girls a 5 minute break and I thought I would spend a couple of those minutes typing, but it looks like my 5 went into 10, so I guess I need to skat!

Later!!

Happy Easter!

We have survived the girls LTC convention this weekend and are drawing to a close of Easter, 2007! Brianna and Tori had a great time this weekend. They both did good at Bible Bowl. Brianna is pumped for next year and has already started studying. They were both in drama and that went well also. My chorus group sounded outstanding (just my humble opinion!!). We really all had a great time. I got to visit with some people that I do not normally get to talk with. All four kids had fun.

Kalli had her 2year old well check. She is still quite small for her age tipping the scales at 22 pounds! Everything else looked great. She got 4 shots so Friday night at the hotel, she was a bit fussy and did not sleep good. Saturday she felt much better.

Easter has been quite relaxing around here. We grabbed breakfast out and then all watched "Facing the Giants" together. It was a pretty good show. What it lacked in the acting department was made up for in the message!

We are getting ready for tomorrow which will be our last coop day for this school year!! I am really excited to be done for the summer. The girls only have six more weeks of regular school and then we are going to have a totally awesome summer!!

Have a wonderful Easter!!

Good Day!

Yesterday was Kalli's 2nd birthday. I still can't believe that she is 2. I am going to post some more pictures of her party.

Boy were we busy yesterday. Brianna had to finish getting a powerpoint presentation ready for a class she is taking. I was just amazed at what a great job that she did putting it together. She decided to do it over God's plan for our lives. She is such an outstanding servant of God. She inspires me often! Her name means "of great faith" and boy has she lived up to that. God has very special plans for her one day!

Tori had several gymnastics practices. She is doing better on her back-handspring so was in a much better mood! That was good for all of us :) She has another practice today and then is off for the weekend.

Speaking of the weekend, we have a leadership training convention to go to for the girls. They are really excited! They will participate in a Bible quiz competition, drama and chorus. It is something that they have done the past few years and have really enjoyed it.

Kalli has a doctor's appointment today for a check-up and shots. I am not looking forward to that.

My girls are such a blessing to me! There are days that I think I must be crazy, and then we have sweet days like yesterday and I see the light! I never imagined that being a mom would be so hard, yet so worth it!!

Later!