Ever heard the phrase, you can't be all things to all people? This has been one of my life motto's. With four kids and homeschooling, I really don't see how one could think any differently. What I have realized today is that I need to reevalute what I am to whom.
I am a wife to my fantastic husband. I realized a couple of weeks ago that even though I am pretty patient with my children, I was not in any way patient with William. I guess it is just that feeling of he will love me no matter what that made me start to neglect my treatment of him. When I would get upset with anyone, he bore the brunt of my frustration. Granted that is one things spouses are there for, to vent, but I was not displaying the respect and kindness when venting that I would to a complete stranger and this is my soulmate! Anyway, I became aware of this and have worked hard to correct it. So again, I am a wife, friend, (any kids stop reading now!)...lover and more to William.
I am mom to four wonderful daughters. Something I have recently realized with them is that in choosing to have four children, I give up the right to stay at home many nights. When you have 4, just doing one extracurricular thing at a time adds up to not being home much during the week. I had been really bothered by that, but I have excepted the fact that they each need to have an outlet and I need to provide it. I am also trying to make better use of our time at home and our waiting time. I am going to stop sitting on my bumpkin during gymnastics and walk around the neighborhood right next to the building. I am going to plan better so that we are not waisting time waiting!
Now I have talked about all of this to get me to this point.....I am a member of the body of Christ or church. This has been my aahhaa today! I have always tried to do "my part" at church. I am seeing that "my part" really has been more providing for my girls since I have tried to stay involved with what they do. We had a sermon and service today based on us as a fellowship. I see that I have failed here completely! I have my few friends from church that I try to keep in contact with, but other than that I mostly get in, get done what needs to get done, and get out. I think a lot of this comes from an anger I have deep down with any assembly. Not to get into details, but this comes from growing up and I think it is still there. Sometimes it is hard to realize that first the church is made of humans who mess up and second that if there is a problem with the church and I am part of the church, then I am part of the problem! I love my church. It was really hard for William and I to find a church and we were so blessed to find RE. There are outstanding people there. I have neglected this part of who I am and what I need to be to others.
Anyway, thanks for sticking with me this long! Probably most of this was rambling, but I needed to put it in writing for myself. What do you think? Do you take the time to not just be the worker bee, but to immerse yourself in the body?
2 comments:
That's a good question. I think it comes down to relationship and seeking to fill the needs of the people that make up the body, instead of just focusing on our "jobs" at church. When we're active in each other's lives and know what's going on with each other it makes us more of a family than an institution.
For me it took several months after I stepped down as children's minister to realize that while that is what I did, it was not who I was. I was a member of the RE body, not just an employee of RE. At Doris James funeral a light bulb clicked that said this is my family and I am in relationship with people here, not just a minister to children. So, I am trying to make new friendships and focus in other areas of ministry.
Post a Comment